Last night had a taste of progress to me. We went out to the club, and for a good chunk of time, Kiara was out. Yes, I let the six-year-old out at a BDSM club. Really, she loves it there. People recognize her and have little problem shifting to treat 'me' like a six-year-old. Roleplay is second nature there, and we are remarkably accepting people. So she was out, talking and making jokes and cuddling with various people.
My ex-boyfriend was there, too. The one we were dating when I realized 'I' was a 'we'. He and I are still very good friends, but one of the reasons we finally broke up - not the only one, though - is that I never felt that he 'got' that I'm multiple. He said he wanted to support and help us any way he could, and I believed him. But he just didn't seem able to wrap his mind around the situation and deal with us as an us. It's okay, lots of people can't.
Even just a few weeks ago, Kiara was obviously out - and it's pretty obvious when she's out; she's not subtle at all - and he started asking me about a conversation we had had earlier. As soon as he started talking, I knew that he was going to disregard that she was there, because he's never really acknowledged anyone other than me before. So I fed Kiara responses to his questions so she didn't have to shift back out.
But last night, he made the leap. Kiara was wandering around, and he actually asked, "So who am I talking to?" And Kiara got to say her name to him, and it was like being seen for the very first time. And when I switched in a few minutes later to help him with something on the computer, he asked again. That was a huge thing for us in regards to him. It felt good.
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