I've Got No Strings [Me]

Cherish slept last night. And woke up.

Now, normally this is not news - most people go to sleep every night and wake up every morning. But it's the first time she's done so. There are many Firsts she has gone through since her creation, and it's very interesting to watch it happen. Most of us learn to do things as babies, a few things at a time. We learn to look, then to reach, then to hold. We don't start off picking things up. Cherish had to do that. The body has all the muscle memory she needs, and as a whole we have all the memories, if only she can figure out how to access them.

When Cherish first came into awareness, she didn't speak. Part of this was uncertainty about what her voice should sound like, what she should say, and if it would please her Master for her to speak. But he wanted to know about her, how she thinks and feels, and speaking became necessary. Often when she speaks, I share quite heavily with her. She is very hesitant to express her own opinion about anything, or even to have one. So I offer some 'push' to her conversation.

And being able to speak does not necessarily mean being able to read or write. There were things she was expected to learn, and we had to find out whether or not she could read to learn them. She can, though it takes several readings for the information to sink in; her comprehension is somewhat sketchy. And she can only write with a lot of help. She's left-handed, like Kiara and Jarett. And I learned to write right-handed, so the body doesn't have the muscle memory for it. It's sufficient for a six-year-old, but not for adults.

One of the first challenges for her was learning to eat. The first time she was out during meal-time, she was handed a bowl, and she honestly had no clue what to do with it. When asked what foods she likes, her answer tends to be an embarrassed smile and a half-shrug. So she has tried a few foods, whenever meal-time has arrived and she is out. We've learned that she likes rice and broccoli, but doesn't seem to like the texture of meats. And she would rather drink water or even juice; soda tickles her nose. Most of us hate broccoli and love Cokes, so it's interesting to watch her eat. When she's eating broccoli, it tastes good through her to me; when I'm out I can't stand the taste or smell of it.

She doesn't have many social skills, either. If she had her way, she'd come out only at home with no one outside the family to see her. But her Master wants her service in public, of course, so out she'll be. As long as she's focused on serving him, whether it's sitting quietly beside him, holding a plate for him to eat from, or listening to him talk to other people, she's pleased to be serving her function. But when she's more than a step away from him, she's terrified. Part of the fear is that when someone comes up to talk to her, they are probably expecting Me, or maybe Kiara. They will expect her to have information and memories that aren't hers. And she just doesn't know how to respond. Ignoring them and moving quickly away would be easiest, but then she fears being rude. And that reflects on her Master poorly. So her social skills need worked on.

And last night she fell asleep. Previously when it's been time to sleep, she's either stayed awake until dismissed, or asked to be dismissed. Either way, someone else has switched in and fallen asleep. Last night, she didn't understand her dismissal, and simple stayed awake - until the body shut down and she fell asleep. The falling asleep didn't seem to disturb her, but she was still out when something woke us. You know that disconnected feeling you have the first few minutes after you wake up? She had never felt that before. She was very disoriented and had trouble 'plugging back in', so to speak. It was still night-time, though, so we managed to switch back out before falling asleep again, making it easier for her.

So Cherish is learning to be a real person. It's a process, with slow progress and crash courses. The things required of her as a slave, she seems to have come equipped with. It's the other things that she has to learn. So if you see her out, be patient with her, and kind.